Being Good Enough

By Christine Pitts
@cpitts_


As human beings we are constantly looking for affirmation that we matter - that we’re good enough. Searching, desiring, hoping and reaching for this feeling tends to be a never ending battle. Where does it end and where do we find peace? The answer is not simple, or easy.

Feeling like you aren't good enough can be sparked from events or even people. Sometimes the person you’re dating decides to end things or the job interview you went on ends in a, "sorry the positions been filled". These things can leave you feeling like you aren't good enough. They can leave you feeling defeated. It can take a few hours, days, weeks and sometimes months to shake this feeling. Unfortunately this feel can also manifest itself into other aspects of your life. Leaving you less energized, less motivated and ultimately less happy.

C.S Lewis once said, “experience that most brutal of teachers, but you learn, my God do you learn” and in my opinion he couldn’t be more right. With each experience that has left me feeling like I am wasn’t good enough I learned ways to deal with and overcome that feeling. I believe you can overcome this feeling, too. It takes time, effort and energy to reframe your thoughts, but it will result in a healthier and happier mindset. Again, this mindset will manifest itself into other parts of your life, which will have a positive effect. Here are some tips that continue to help me battle the feeling of not being good enough:

  1. Recognize what events or even people trigger this feeling. The ending of a relationship, not getting a job offer, or getting a bad grade on a paper. For me these are some events in my life that constantly beat me down. Once I have recognized them I can deal with them.
  2. Reframing. Personally, when I feel like I am not good enough it is always associated with negative self-talk. "I messed up, I shouldn’t have done/said this, I wore the wrong outfit, I'm stupid/idiot/dumb/foolish..." Should of, could of, would of, but I didn't. Instead of beating yourself try reframing the situation. So you didn't get the job: "I know next time to wear a suite, be early, etc" or “ that wasn’t the right job for me and the right one is out there” 
  3. Remind yourself that you are good enough. So, the person you were dating ended things, they weren't the person for you and that's okay. The right person is out there. The right job is out there. Focus on your strengths and the positive things in your life. You are worth it!
Too often in life we are impatient. We want our goals to be accomplished now! We want to find the one now! We want our dream job now! But how boring would life be if we always got what we wanted when we wanted it? I think it would be pretty boring. 

So, if you are job searching now, if you’re getting out of a relationship, if you got a bad grade or if you are just not feeling like you're good enough, please know that you are good enough. I believe that. I believe the right job is out there and the right person is out there and that one bad grade won't be the end of the world.

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2 comments :

  1. I truly relate to this. This is such truth in my life and a lot of people I know. Thank you for writing this and sharing it with us!

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