Can We Have it All?


Last night I was stalking the websites of community theatres in Chicagoland. It’s been over two years since I’ve been in a show and every once in a while I imagine myself learning lines, singing songs, and dancing choreography like I used to every summer since elementary school. I miss the stage.

I know there are only a finite number of hours in a day and one person can only do so much. I know I have a long way to go in my career and I can’t plan out my entire life today. But I know what I want. I want to love my job and eventually become an administrator with a Ph.D. in hand. I want a loving spouse and children. I want to continue to pursue my passions of travel and theatre. I want it all!

This morning I was talking to a professional acquaintance about how she and her husband moved four times in the course of their relationship so she could pursue different positions and advance her career in higher education. She told me the same words a mentor told her, “Women can have it all, just not at the same time.”

Juggling the demands of a career like Student Affairs is a constant battle in and of itself. Now, add another person and his career into the mix. On top of that, sprinkle in a couple of spawn and all the commitments they require. But wait, there’s more! I also want to do a show that requires three months of rehearsals after work and two weekends of performances. AND, on the off chance I have a couple of days to see the world, I want to backpack through China or cruise the Artic seas.

I see my life filled to the brim and have no idea how it will all fit together. I’m trying to stay positive, and I don’t want to give anything up because each of these pieces makes up a part of who I am. I don’t know how it will all work out, but I think about the people in my life who have found a way to have it all and I’m inspired. For example, my actor friends are teachers, engineers, flight attendants, and business owners. A close mentor is VP of Student Affairs and devoted wife.

What is your vision for the future? Do you think it’s possible to get everything out of life that you desire?

Christina Ferrari

@cm_ferrari3

Student Affairs - the First Years

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2 comments :

  1. This acquaintance is telling the truth; the only difference is that it's not just women who have to live by this (although it's more pertinent for us). I am still fairly new to Student Affairs, but I am a regular volunteer with Girl Scouts, got married less than 4 months ago, and intend to take a significant trip (7-10 days) at minimum every other year.

    10 years ago when I first set out in the professional world, I wasn't anywhere near that; it took time, energy and long, hard looks at myself to be able to juggle it all. When my spouse & I decide to have children in a few years, all of that will have to be re-juggled again.

    Audition for that show! It will be a huge drain on your time and energy, but it should (if not-stop doing it, or don't do it again) allow you to re-focus your concentration, to re-ignite your passion for both Student Affairs and theater. You will regret not doing it--maybe not this show, but the next one, or the one after that.

    Sometimes your desires change, but you won't know unless you try them out.

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  2. Thanks, jrobin19, for your comments! I know it's difficult to decide when and how to manage everything and you're right-- there is a season for everything. This summer I definitely hope to do some type of performance, even if it isn't a full production. I suppose it's true what they say, if it's important you'll find a way to make it work. :)

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